Creating a Culture

  

   When I was a senior in high school I had a conversation with a lovely, Christian, sophomore girl about what she wanted to be when she grew up.  And this young lady said "I want to get married and have kids, but first I want to do something important. I want to help the world in some way."  Even at the age of eighteen I was completely shocked by this remark. Since when have we separated "helping the world" and "doing something important" from being a wife and mother?  There is no job more meaningful, important, or life-changing than the job of homemaking, but the world does not understand this.

      One important task of the homemaker is that she is creating and fostering a certain type of culture within the home--by culture I mean beliefs, customs, practices (traditions) and social behaviors. Culture forms us. We need these things in order to have deep and meaningful interaction with others.  The type of environment that her children will be raised in and her husband surrounded by, is determined and built by the homemaker. She teaches her children habits and traditions; she establishes within them a sense of right and wrong.  As a mother I shape my children's moral compass and I determine how they view the world.  From my interaction with my husband my daughters learn how to treat men and my sons learn, hopefully, how a wife should treat a husband. Our children hear how we talk to our own mothers and follow our example.  We teach them eating habits, manners, modesty, social skills, and so much more. By the way that we keep our house we show them what a home should look and feel like. A child watches a mom clean the bathroom (a task that he knows that he hates to do) and he sees her do it well and with a smile on her face.  Through her homemaking she has taught him how to do tasks, even when you do not want to, how to work hard, and how to do so with good grace. Our orderliness and cleanliness teaches those around us how to live orderly lives. When there is security and comfort within the home, the children raised in this environment will be more secure in their personal lives.

    Our comfortable home brings peace and joy to others.  Our hospitality and kindness makes others feel special. Our attentions are not divided between home and work.  Unlike men, who are very good at compartmentalizing, women have a really hard time keeping different areas of their lives separate.  If something at work was stressing us, that stress will carry over into our home and affect our family. We are less patient with everyone and less attentive to others when outside worries and cares are weighing down upon us. This task of homemaking is a full-time job and it requires all of our time and attention.  This is not a small thing that we can only give half of our mind to.  We have been entrusted with the care of immortal souls and this is not something that should be taken lightly. 

The woman is at the heart of the home. Let us pray that we women realize the reason for our existence: to love and be loved and through this love become instruments of peace in the world.

~Mother Theresa

Quote of the Day

"True love means going out of oneself, giving oneself. Love brings joy, but a joy whose roots are in the shape of a cross. As long as we are on earth and have not yet arrived at the fullness of the future life, we can never have true love without sacrifice and pain. This pain becomes sweet and lovable; it is the source of interior joy. But it is an authentic pain, for it involves overcoming one's own selfishness and taking Love as the rule of each and every thing we do. (Christ is passing by, 43)"
                                                         ~Opus Dei, Oct. 31 Message of the Day

A Bit About Me

Homemaking is the best and most important job that a married woman can ever do. Modern society has "freed" women from the "oppression" of being barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen." We have rebelled against the idea of the woman staying at home each day while her husband goes off to work in order to "bring home the bacon." We have pictures in our minds of the stay-at-home mom sitting on the couch, hair in curlers, watching t.v., and eating bon bons. We make television shows about "desperate housewives" who are frustrated with life. People believe that for a woman to be "liberated" she must find work outside of the home. We believe that in order for a woman to "make a difference in the world." She needs to do more than be "Just a Homemaker." Even within good Christian societies homemakers are rarely respected and viewed as something of great importance. Rather, homemakers are those who are either too lazy or too stupid to do anything else. We look at women's frustrations at being home constantly and, rather than recognizing it as an attack by the devil, we view it as the oppression of women.  The world has falsely diagnosed the problem and introduced the feminine movement and degraded the married woman's most honorable profession, homemaking.
   Let me say here, that I am not a completely conservative freak.  I am a college graduate with a degree history and English.  I taught high school English, worked for a non-profit organization in the area of development, and worked in publications. I hold very strong opinions about religion and life (though I am always happy to listen to the, politely communicated, opinions of others). I am independent and stubborn. I am a Roman Catholic, though I do not cover my head in Mass or desire to attend only the Latin Mass. I do believe, and strive to follow, the teachings of the Church. I will always be Pro-Life, NEVER pro-choice. I will never vote for any candidate who is not pro-life, regardless of any of his other views.  I like to think about style, to look nice, and to wear make-up. I don't just wear skirts, I do occasionally drink (though  not to excess).  I love to dance, to read mysteries, fantasies, and children's books, and I watch (sometimes far too many) silly shows on television. I submit to my husband (though at times this is hard). What I am trying to say is, I'm a pretty normal person, but, I also think that being a homemaker is the MOST IMPORTANT job that a married woman can do.

Why I Started This

I recently gave a talk at high school career day on the "career choice" of being a homemaker.  When I was first asked to give this talk I was very excited. I know that the world judges homemakers and that the modern view of stay-at-home moms is warped and twisted.  I was, therefore, more than happy to go and "set the record straight" with these high schoolers. While it did not really turn out like this, it was a very good experience for me as it made me think a lot more about the importance of being a homemaker.
     As I prepared my talk I googled "importance of homemaking" and I search out what others had to say about the significance of the homemaker. I found one blog entry that said, basically, "it glorifies God, so it is important." While I fully agree with this sentiment, it is not the Only reason, so I searched some more, but to no avail.
      Therefore, after much thought, I decided that I wanted to defend, promote, and explain the importance of homemaking, so here I am.