Less is More

I want to take a moment to focus upon a point of homemaking that I have obliquely mentioned, but not discussed openly.  A homemaker need never feel ashamed for not working outside of the home.  Yes, the world sees us as underachievers. We are the women who are taking the easy way out by choosing to not make much of ourselves in the world; the women who are content to be mediocre, at least that is what the world says.  The truth of the matter is that the way people see the world has become twisted and warped, the homemakers are not the ones who are settling for less but rather they are striving for more.  True meaning and worth is not found in a job outside of the home but rather within it.  This is the important work, this is what needs to be done, and no one can do it as well as we can. 

Sometimes homemakers are made to feel ashamed if they don’t do enough.  We live in an extremely fast paced world and therefore we think that the busier people are, the better job that they are doing.  There is, however, nothing wrong with doing less, with taking the time to slow down.  You don’t have to prove your worth as a homemaker by volunteering on a million committees or belonging to tons of bookclubs or kids clubs, or going on playdates and outings every week.  Your child does not have to play every sport every season or play every musical instrument.  You do not need to spend half of your time each week in the car driving people places.  Sometimes it is good to say no to some of the fun things that people want us to do. In order to do things for others or for our children, we often overextend ourselves so that by the end of the every single day we are completely exhausted. Our first responsibility is to our families, to create peaceful and loving environments for those around us. Is it fair to the husband when the wife is tired and cranky and stressed by the time that he gets home because she was gone for most of the day and the kids missed their naps so they are in a rotten mood? Is it fair to the children when they spend so much time going from one thing to another that there is no stability in their lives? No.  Our first ministry is within our homes not outside of them.  If you can do everything and still maintain an ordered and stable home, then that is wonderful, but most women are not superman (well woman but superwoman doesn’t sound right to me). 

 We need to remember that oftentimes, for everything that we do outside of the home, something inside of the home suffers.  I am not saying that we should seclude ourselves inside our houses and never do anything. What I am saying is that we need to look to the home first, get that in order, think of our spouses and our children before taking on more tasks.  This job is big enough on its own without adding outside stresses.  If we cannot first do This well, why are we trying to take on more? With the state of the world, it is now, more than ever, important that we create a wholesome and Christian culture within our homes.  This is not a part-time, half-hearted job and we should never be made to feel ashamed for giving it the necessary time and attention.

"Every Christian home should be a place of peace and serenity. In spite of the small frustrations of daily life, an atmosphere of profound and sincere affection should reign there together with a deep-rooted calm, which is the result of authentic faith that is put into practice." (Christ is Passing By, 22, 4: from Opus Dei, daily message, January 9, 2003)